That's a Joke, Right?

So I'm sitting in these Weight Watchers meetings, and I like them - I've always liked them. But sometimes, I feel like I've stepped off the planet. Like I'm in some group therapy with total mentals and I'm the only one NOT needing further medication.
Case in point - a lengthy conversation that was held about what you could do if you had a craving.

Like, if you wanted a cookie.

Ummm.

What?

See, this isn't a fat issue in my opinion, it's some sort of "I'm a girl pay attention to me/my cookie want is a cry for help" sort of issue. It's a woman's issue, of the most lame and stereotypical sort. It's the stuff BAD sitcoms are made of but there I sat, listening to grown women try to come up with a list of things they could do BESIDES eat that cookie.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Can you see GUYS having this kind of conversation:

"Hi Jim, It's Bob, I was calling you because I was thinking of eating a cookie."
"Umm, what?"
"Well there's this cookie, and I was really thinking of eating it but at Weight Watchers they suggested I call a friend instead of eating that cookie so you know, I decided to give you a call."
"No really, why did you call?"
"You know, it's this cookie, I was wanting to eat it but YOU KNOW, I thought if I did something else, filled my time in some other WAY - well, maybe my need for the cookie would pass."
"Shut the fuck up what did you call for? What's up?"
Pause. Silence. "Umm, I was thinkin' about going fishing Sunday you wanna go?"
"Yeah see ya."
click.

Ladies, put down the cookies. I'm serious.

Or, just HAVE a fucking cookie. Have ONE COOKIE. Or have TWO and say "I just had two cookies and that was a snack."

Because my girls, you do not look like members of the Hutt family because you "ate a cookie". No girls - you are Hutts because you ate your weight in cookies during the 90s.

Class is out.

I'm going to have a cookie.